wind. blind. arjun. santhi. and chetan.

crawling in my skin,

these wounds they will not heal.

fear is how i fall,

confusing wut is real.

obviously, this has got nuthing to do with wut gonna follow...

its 12 in the noon, and i've put my deadline as 1230 to complete the post. (30 mins will he do that? will he be able to complete his operation-complete-blog and save the world?)

day b4 yesterday
i've been poking nose into my btech and intermediate friends' lives, since last few days. felt like talking vth jeevan and siva in US. tried to jeevan first, he asked me to call after 10mins. then, i tried siva's number. got his mobile number from praveen. when i called up that number, a female voice answered the call.... 'helloooooah'. wuts this? is siva playing practical jokes vth me? (praveen had already told siva that, i am gonna call in a couple of mins.) 'can i speak to siva?'... 'helloooooah?'. wut? did i talk in malayalam or wut? 'hello. can i speak to siva? helloooo...'... 'sheeeeva? who sheeeeva? whoz dis?' 'huh. sorry! i guess...wrong number.' 'helloooooah?'. i save my digestive system goin for a toss, by hunging up before i swallow the receiver in frustration. i thot, i keyed in the number wrongly and i thot lets try again. 'hellooooah' again! abbbaa... then i said slowly... 'when a phone rings... somebody has to answer it.''whut?'.i said nuthing and i hung up. leaving that gal to her confusion.

after stuggling a bit i managed to complete a lil conversation in that stinky VOIP kiosk... went to college and got out after reading a couple of blogs and listening to some rock by linkin park. rock is really gettin into me these days... kickstarted THE BLACK STALLION... it was the awesome climate... the magical cloudy evening after sunny fore and afternoons. i thot i'll hav a great ride with this cool breeze and abt to burst rainy atmosphere... i was proved wrong after driving a kilometre... as the dusty storms of wind started hitting my face... corpses of newpapers and chocolate wraps stated kissing my helmet's view glass... i had to pick up nani from work. i was feeling like an autowaala now. (yes, autowalah is the mighty fella in hyderabad, he parks his auto anywhere, he can answer anyone, if at all anyone dares to question him. he takes a sudden turn in middle of the road. he drives 60KMPH in the wrong direction of one-way, hez the mighty. hez the monarch.)

got nani onto the back seat and headed for kakathiya... our dinner spot. managed non-drenched-ride till now. but once we got outta kakathiya, it was pouring rats n mouses (i mean... not so heavy down fall). got into the corridor of a commercial complex waiting for the rain to settle. then thot, on these gals, veena and santhi must be a witch... or something like dat... it was summer-y like hell till yesterday, and these ppl put their desire to play in rain (in one of our chain mails)... the whole conversation among the gang was abt re-play on my mind screen... but suddenly this scene wiped that thing off. two teens, probably workers of kakatheeya, were making an effort to rescue themselves from teh drzzle by a blanket... they were hugging each other and were lying down in a we-want-to-be-gays position. now, i really wanted this rain to settle down.

reached home after getting a lassi parcel for rakesh and after getting drenched in rain, which took a break and started again. (u know, we used to think that, rains happen when god pisses from skies above. aaaaah, those sweet days.... paper boats, catching colored fishes in rain water, scolds from mom for the dirty clothes, steam inhalations after catching cold... hot pakodi in rain... man! childhood was bliss). we opened the lock of the main door and got into to see sirdhar waving his mobile phone, i unlocked the keypad (to lit it) and waved back. 'okey! entry granted' he said. it was dark as the power was off. rakesh told 'its like this since last hour'

now, the next mission was to take bath, with cool climate but sultry surroundings inside... i was needing a bath badly... after waiting for hal-an-hour i've decided to take bath without light. while taking bath, this strange idea struck my lunatic brain. how wud i manage if i lose my vision? some accident on a creepy midnite, or me falling off a 100 storied building... or wuttever... wut if i get blind? i tried avoiding the slightest moonlight coming from the window by closing my eyes. i completed the bath. my eyes closed. looking at my favorite color. i never thot i vl get bored seeing black. but i was wrong. how wud it be, if i go blind? motorola will throw me out... (fires me, technically) then wut wud i do then? wut a blind person does for his living? singing doest need any visual capabilities but i know i am a bad singer. teaching students? no one will agree to give their responsibility to a blild fella. or as most blind ppl do... getting a telephone booth permission under PH quota? but how my business will be in this 'mobile-phone-is-like-an-asshole-everbody-has-got-one' era. who will come to me and use my phone and pay for it. and if anybody comes wuts the guarantee that they wont take my blindness as advantage and abscond after making a call and not paying the rent? or shud i put a sign board saying... 'please pay the bill, god is watching u'... suddenly i will start saying 'god is there and his name is braille'. or shall try my goal in life, putting up a restarant. but who will give finance for a blind guy? and even if i manage to get finance, how wud i manage a restaurant. how wud i make it sure that it will be exactly as gud as the dream restaurant. now, my other dream the goal of my life had started melting... the dream of driving a mercedes-benz. i dont need an amitabh bachan now, coz i've already completed my graduation and PG. i shud ask sanjay leela bansali, 'is there any sequel to BLACK? i mean, how the blind make their living n all?'... wait will get my MTech degree if lose my vision tomarrow? will PRK support me? i mean i hav done substantially gud work to demand a degree. but will they agree for it? how wud i complete my thesis? will i get married? even if some good at heart gal likes me and agrees to marry me, how far it wud b gud? i mean, how can i ruin a gal's life? how wud my parents feel? damn, enuf man!! i thot...

yesterday
got to know abt the news that arjun singh is going to pass a bill increasing the SC/ST quota in educational institutions. it will be 50% in institutions like IITs and IIMs. being a SC, i still feel that its not gud decision to take. at the time of BR Ambedkar, i agree dat almost all of Backward and scheduled castes were treated badly. they werent accepted by the society. so, the potests this man made were necessary to bringup those backward castes, crushed ruthlessly under the boots of those so called agra varna people. but, things have changed. so, are the people. now, its not a point to give quotas based on caste. empowering the power should be the motto. not empowering perticular commune or caste. the reservations should be based on financial states, must not be based on a caste. empowering a part of society should not supress the talents in the other part of society.
Sign the online petition -> http://www.petitiononline.com/obcrev/petition.html
read this -> Arjun Singh is answerable to EC...http://www.hindu.com/thehindu/holnus/001200604081658.htm
Write to the president now:presidentofindia@rb.nic.in
Write to Arjun Singh, give a slap across the face.arjuns@sansad.nic.in
go here.

i had some mis-understandings with santhi, my best friend, i hope everything is okay now, after a talk sitting in university futball ground. hope, everything is fine now. i guess i managed it well. i am sorry, santhi, if i ever hurted u. i din meant it that way. u r my best friend.

now, after a frustrating day, one needs a good sleep. but i spent the whole nite doing something other than sleep. its understandable if u do sketch, u pass the night preparing for exams, or watching movies or photoshopping... but reading a book? raj, how can u do this yaar? i mean, u were never like this. reading a book whole nite? wuts wrong with u? but the book was worth reading. its five point someone. i read chetan bhagat's one night @ call centre. both the books were damn impressive.

here it is, almost 1 hour, how can anyone on earth write a post in half an hour?